HPCSAUPMR5K

PAX:  Nipple Shot, The Second Mile, Puddles (Respect), Blart (Respect), Steamer, Plunger, Medium Mic, Misty, FNG Delta, Madoff (Respect), Suitcase (Respect), Jangle Leg, Lassie, Holiday Mansion, Shroom, Deebo, Gertrude (Respect), Immigrant, Ma Bell (ENC), Rooney, Pedro (War Daddy Respect Respect Respect), Poca, Hot Lava (War Baby), Villa, Thunder Bob (War Baby), Winnie the Pooh, Duck Butter

 

Saturday means one hour workout day.  And Saturday, May 5^th, 2018 offered a lot for the men of Carterico.  The men of the western expansion, the Manifest Destiny of F3 Carterico, if you will, were celebrating a calendar flipping, naming a new site q (congrats Lunchbox), and were being led by one of their tent poles, Purple Rain.  The option to the East was the 3^rd oldest F3 Carterico workout, the Hero Patriot.  In a “hey yall watch this” type moment, it was decided at coffeteria a week prior, to combine the Hero Patriot with the Mosquito Run 5k/10k.  That meant leaving the friendly confines of West Carteret High School, and planting the flag right in the heart of touristville, Ft Macon.

One of F3 Carterico’s, at that time F3 Morehead, first philanthropic pursuits was to raise money for the completion of the walking/running/rucking trail around Ft Macon State Park.  It all started with a GroupMe post from Lassie, and within hours Deebo had matched our efforts with his own and a path was born.  Tclaps men.

The Friends of Fort Macon, with a lot of help financially, help keep Ranger Randy in stylish headwear and give him an ability to add amenities to the park.  So it only made sense to push the PAX into doubling down and posting at the Hero Patriot AND then running a 5k or a 10k to show our support for one of our AOs.

A 0630 launch time allowed for a pretty scenic drive across the AB bridge and down the banks to the fort.  Even Hot Lava recognized the scenic beauty of where we call home.  As the PAX gathered, another Carteret County tradition had started.  Gnats.  Those little bastards were everywhere.  Swarming.  Smothering.  They were so bad that Winnie the Pooh didn’t even run the race.  Not that we noticed.

A seamless welcome and disclaimer were given to the swelling PAX, with the usual debaucherous comments about YHC’s hair, Dipper’s absence, and Shroom’s…well, you know.  Off we headed out of the parking lot and before we could reach our first destination, we circled back to pick up a tardy Rooney.  This would not be the last time many of us would circle back to find Rooney, more on that later.  The question on most folks mind as Rooney sprung from his Dodge was why isn’t he wearing shorts?  Weird.  But he quickly joined up as we headed down the Shackelford Trail for

Warmarama

I think it was Poe that said running in sand sucks.  Nipple Shot must have studied some of the Baltimorean poet’s works at State, as he was recounting this same idea as we ran through some soft dune sand to a quaint little spot where all of God’s works were present.  The sunrise, wind, the youthful exuberance of the 2.0s, and the sounds of the Atlantic Ocean.  I can still see it, hear it, and smell it.

SSHs IC x25

Cotton Pickers IC x15—Deebo shows up.  No burpees were assigned because Deebo was running a 10k afterwards and that level of bad assedry allows for some concessions.

Sun Gods IC forward x10, overhead claps IC x10, reverse SGs IC x10

Imperial Walkers IC x15

Hillbillies IC x15, we did them both because I knew at some point I’d get them right

Right over left stretch.  Ma Bell releases what can only be described as canon fodder.  FNG Two Balls yells now it’s a party.  Everyone laughed.

Left over right stretch.

And we were off again back towards the fort.  Puddles was not happy about sand in his shoes.  Rooney and Winnie were still present at this point.  PAX moseyed across the road, and down into the Fort for some fun inside the common area.  PAX was reminded that the Fort was built for war and not for play, which reminded me of Full Metal Jacket and the “this one’s for fightin’ and this one’s for fun” part.

Thang 1-If These Walls Could Talk

PAX lines up shoulder to shoulder, or for some of us, shoulder to mid naval.  Bear crawl from north side to south side of the fort, 5 burpees performed and then Lt Dan back to the other side.  Rinse and repeat.  There is way too much brick wall at the fort not to get in some People’s chair.  So after bear crawl lap #2 each man assumed the position for a 10 count.  YHC should have counted the number of PAX before deciding on a 10 count in hindsight, candor.  And you certainly can’t do People’s Chairs without some Balls to Forts Walls.  PAX again assumes the position, with each man giving a 5 count.  Half the count didn’t matter.  It sucked.

Thang 2-The View

PAX runs up the steep stone steps on the east side, and climbs over the wall to the top of the Fort’s interior wall.  This is what we came for.  The vista we overlooked was the money shot if you will.  Lassie may still be up there.  It was indeed glorious.  Upon the grass laden natural berm, we completed 20 Copperhead squats, before moseying back down and out of the Fort, fo

Thang 3-Holy Trinity or Quadinity

PAX moseys over to the visitors center knee wall and picnic area for

Erkins IC x20

Step Ups IC x20

Derkins IC x10, sidenote YHC modified these much to the chagrin of Jang.  Sorry, my hip bursitis wouldn’t allow me to complete the derkins.  Said bursitis would not keep from completing the 5k however.  Cough, Winnie, cough, Rooney, cough.

Dips on the picnic tables IC x20

Villa provided a much appreciated 10 count.  It also created quite the scene for the early arriving patrons and volunteers of the Mosquito Run.  Some thought they were late.  Some thought we were crazy.  Luckily Steamer was there to let them know they could join at any point, and he asked one lady if she’d be wearing those shorts for the entire race.  I have no idea what that meant.  But she seemed oddly at ease with the inquiry.  Later on in the evening, at a Kentucky Cinco de Derby party, ole Steamer would don a pair of seer sucker “shorts” that accentuated his upper thighs.  Maybe they were sharing inseam lengths?  Regardless, the PAX moseys out and around the perimeter of the Fort to the south facing “wall.”  Madoff asks if YHC knows there is a race after this.  Suitcase told Madoff to stand down and do as he was told.  Madoff always respectful of his elders complied.

We arrive at the south border fence and behold, a double hill.  A lurker if you will.  Misty informed us all the second hill on top of the hill was in fact an old artillery bunker from colonial times.  Gert of course disagreed and said something about it was the old septic tank.  Both ideas carried some merit as we were about to do an event called BOMBS and it would be a shit show.

Thang 4-Dora Bombs

The PAX partnered up.  YHC was paired with Nipple Shot and Immigrant and it needs to be noted that we did 33% more reps than all other pairs so as to not cheat.  Luckily YHC is a numbers guy and no abacus was needed.  Madoff paired up with the FNG he EH’d.  He is in the “Navy.”  It’s important to point out that most often FNGs need support, encouragement, and modification.  This cat was built like a brick shit house and he kept a look on his face like when is this going to get hard.  He was in the “Navy” all right.

B.O.M.B.S Dora style.  Partner A would run up the double hill and come back down to switch with his partner.  Partner B would be performing the prescribed exercise AMRAP aggregate until the total between each man was met.

B—Burpees x50

O-Overhead Presses x100

M-Merkins x150

B-Big Boy WWI or because of our locale Civil War Sit ups x200

S-Squats x250

YHC and Big Mic shared a moment and collective breathe at the top of the big hill and spoke of the natural beauty of our surroundings and an approaching Plunger told me that this was the dumbest thing he’d ever done.  Both sentiments seemed appropriate.

Rooney and Winnie the Pooh were partners during the BOMBS and hatched an elaborate plan to sneak off during the transition from the Hero Patriot to the Mosquito Run.  They told no one.  Winnie the Pooh kept laughing in some Dr Evil type way.  Rooney kept saying shhh.  No one realized what was going on.

Pedro provided a brief respite with a 10 count and recounting for the PAX what Hard Tack was like during the Brother’s War.  After his first person account of life in the Fort, we were off back down the highway towards the parking lot.  We moseyed through more arriving runners and surf fisherman and commandeered the visitors center picnic area again for

Mary Broga

The massive, sweaty, and hard breathing PAX circled up in front of a crowd of onlookers for some mary and some cool down stretching.

LBCs IC x25

Low Slow Flutters IC x20

Box Cutters IC x15

Followed up by attempt at broga.  There was some upward and downward dogs.  Some pidgeons.  Some of that pull up a knee and cross a leg thing.

Hard Stop.

Announcements

We named our Navy Seal FNG Delta.  The Delta Force is the Army’s version of a special ops crew.  And since our FNG was clearly a special operator Delta was chosen over Two Balls, Wrong Hole, and Fart Mocon.

Lassie would like you to all know polls open at 6 on Tuesday.

We would rally at the top of the hill after registration for a group picture before the Mosquito Run.  Rooney and Winnie refuse to make eye contact.

The Slick Cam opens back up next weekend.

BRR team meets May 17^th at the Bistro at 6:15 pm.

Prayer Concerns

David Hesmer

Doublemint

Big Mike, who is one of Big Mic’s team members

Big Mic took the PAX out in the COT.

 

Duck’s Thoughts

The F3 credo is to leave no man behind, but leave no man where you find him.  I am not sure I can adequately express the pride I had on Saturday during the Mosquito Run.  I’ll grant you some of these guys that ran the race may have been tricked or even shamed into participating, but they did.  Villa, Pedro, Immigrant, Nipple Shot, Thunder Bob, and Hot Lava all ran their first 5k.  And they did it after covering 3 miles in a workout prior to the start.  I know it was hard.  I did it too.  I thought my leg was going to fall off between miles 1 and 2.  But knowing that we were all there together and that no one would quit, neither did I.  Did I mention that Deebo ran a 46 minute 10k.  That’s ridiculous.  Gert won his age division.  Misty and Jang were in the top 3 in the 30-39 category with Misty winning it.  And F3 Carterico took home 7 of the top 10 finishers in the 40-49 category, with Lassie winning that one.  Aflac ran his first 5k while pushing young Weeks in his stroller.  Bongwa pushed his 2.0 in a stroller for the 10k.

I feel confident in saying that each man finished that race in a time that was better than he expected.  Every single person ran farther than they thought they would, walked if they had to, and then ran some more.  Somebody has to be the last man, and he didn’t finish by himself.  Everyone had stuck by the finish line until we were all done.  Tclaps to each of you.  Saturday was a strong showing.  Saturday renewed my energy and spirit.  Saturday led our 2.0s to get up at 5 am on Monday and post at the Table Setter.  This was because of what you ALL did to inspire and encourage our kids.  Plant, grow, serve.  Leave no man behind, but leave no man where you find him.

 

Thanks for allowing me to share the morning with you

DB, out