Pulling in to CHS with less than five minutes to spare, the Q looked over and saw purplerain already practicing “lay and pray”. It was going to be a good day! With no wind and 66°, it was the perfect weather for an outdoors work out! Frank n beans and kiwi completely ruined their vehicle’s suspension coming over the last speedbump in the student parking lot of Croatan, and somehow manage to make it to the flag with a couple of seconds to spare. A quick fumbling mission statement and a disclaimer were said, and with no Snooki in sight to hear the griping, we started off with a mosey. We stopped at the field in front of the auditorium for some warmarama:
10 IC each: windmills, girl fights, Frankensteins.
Then mosey to the front lot for: reverse snow angels, active Hamstrings, down and up dogs. During the reverse snow angels (face down), Birdman made a comment about his pubic bone pushing on the concrete. Either his belly has gotten smaller, or there isn’t much to say for his manhood. The mystery remains. 🤷♂️
That was enough warm-up. The pax lined up along the curb for five WOJO squats, or as I was corrected, Bobby Hurley‘s. Either way we touched the ground with a squat jump five times then ran to the center of the lot for five monkey humpers and to the opposite side for five more Wojo Hurley things. This pattern repeated back-and-forth across the parking lot reducing the reps by one each time. With the thighs on fire, it was time to switch to the shoulders. We did a plank step up progression on the curb in 4 directions, 10 times IC each, and 10 IC air presses between each set. We also ran a palate cleanser to the opposite side of the lot between each set. Just when we thought we were done, we did two more of that cycle with plank curb step downs in each direction. Frank n beans got excited with finishing 10 air presses on the last rep, but wait, there was no inflection!… and we proceeded on to 50 IC air presses. During this series, couch potato and purple rain we’re in deep conversation. The Q looked over to see purplerain doing not air presses, but what could only be described as jazz-hands as if he was singing in a Broadway play. 😂
Next, we moseyed over to the picnic tables for more quad burn out. Brockovich is such a man that he still comes to F3 workouts with a broken shoulder. He does most arm exercises with one arm, and is a great example of modifying as needed. But, the Q had sympathy for him so everything with the picnic tables involved the legs. We performed a couple cycles of box squats (touch your butt to the bench), step ups, and more of those WOJO Bobby Hurley squat jump things… Whatever you call them, they just hurt by the end. We then ran over to the great hill of Croatan. We did one Texas Merkin, backpedaled up the hill, one WOJO squat, and back down the hill. Next cycle: 2 Texas Merkens, and backpedal up the hill to repeat. We continue this through five cycles, until the back pedal up the hill was causing the quads to scream for a stop. Looking at the clock, it was time to mosey back towards the flag. Each man grabbed a water bottle and headed to the practice field. We Circled up for some ab work: we performed a series of exercises in an American Hammer position (I have no idea what they’re called). With heels over the water bottle, We did: feet together taps on each side, taps in the middle and then outside, and taps IC 1 foot at a time over the bottle. palate cleanser lap to the gym and back. This time in plank position over the water bottle, we did merkins with touching your chest to the bottle each rep, then plank step overs (side to side and then forwards/backwards). This was followed by 25 IC air presses and another palate cleanser lap to the gym and back. With less than two minutes remaining, we did TRUE low slow flutters where heels had to touch the water bottle each rep. We then had just enough time for 25 more Merkens with touching your chest to the water bottle. Hard stop. Nine men counted off, name a Rama, announcements, and prayer requests. We discussed and prayed for the Jacksonville launch, our F3 brothers in the triathlon this weekend, and Navy in Dash8’s second F on Saturday night. Please RSVP ASAP. Thank you princess for the opportunity to Q the rolling stone. Thank you Birdman for containing your flatulence today. Good silent push Cheech and kiwi 👊. Thank you for the support and accountability my F3 brothers. Beautiful morning!