• When: 4/8/2019
  • Workout Style: Boot Camp
  • QIC: Duck Butter
  • PAX: Lassie, Plunger, The 2nd Mile, Suit Case (Respect), Bayliner, Steamer, Deebo, Bueller, Denver, Shroom, Au Jus, Rooney (in a polo), Misty, Jangle Leg, Pasqually (OG), Gert (Respect), Duck Butter
  • AO: Table Setter

You ever put something on paper, thinking it is a good idea, only to execute it and question your life?  Yep, did that today.  Quick backstory, a few of us were sitting on Lassie’s front porch, post furniture re positioning, when he suggested moving the Table Setter to the Shroom’s Skate Park on the beach.  YHC while on an afternoon ruck, pulled in to recon the park and see if it would be suitable for an AO and decided it would do for a change of scenery.  So basically this whole thing was Shroom’s fault.

It was exciting to drive over the barrel less bridge this morning as opposed to heading downtown MHC.  Speaking of the bridge construction, did they really do anything?  Doesn’t look paved?  Whatever.  After making the elongated commute, approximately 14 seconds further than the Sanitary, I pulled into a well lit wonderland of concrete, grass, and sand.  After a quick tour and strategically placing a basketball on the blacktop court, YHC made himself available to welcome the arriving Pax.  Shockingly it did not take long for the whining to commence about how far they had traveled.  Steamer and Pasqually apparently were playing the parts of Balthasar and Gaspar as they interloped from Newport….I mean Brandywine.

Regardless of the incessant comments a welcome was given followed by one of the most butchered mission statements in recent history.  It was like I channeled my inner Jim Tom.  Quick recovery from my botched efforts and the Pax was on the move.  I think we made it about 7 feet before Deebo was all over YHC about our new F3 running club.  I am what you made me.  Let’s welcome back the guys who were Googling Balthasar and Gaspar.  Monkey Wrench requires my back blasts be entertaining as well as educational.  You’re welcome.

We dodged a two wheeled 2nd Mile as he came in hot and crossed over the highway into the Skate Park amidst screams of car.  Never saw em.  Don’t know what you’re talking about.  Run faster.  With the southerly breeze the best place to warmarama was beside the weekend’s worth of trash in the Chinese Food joints dumpster.


Burpees OYO until a tardy 2nd Mile joined us

SSH IC x20

Cotton Pickers IC x10—gentle reminder for the Pax to count here

Irish Potato Pickers IC x10—Pasqually gets pissed about Irish Potatoes not being able to be distilled to make vodka.  Interesting coming from a man who only drinks his coffee “Irish.”  Come to think of it, most everything he drinks is “Irish.”  Hmmm.

Sun Gods Forward x10, Reverse x10—Sweat begins to appear on Rooney’s collared shirt.  Not his collard shirt.  That would just be weird.

R/L hang, L/R hang

We were then off on the mosey, chasing a trash truck for

Thang 1-Merkin Mile(ish)

The Pax was led on a lap around the spacious Atlantic Station with intermittent stops for 10-20 merkins, both single count and in cadence as YHC saw fit.  We passed by the old Pak-A-Sak where YHC was a produce man as a high schooler.  We passed by the Old Watermark where Misty lost his fake ID at age 17.  SMH.  We passed by Battle Works where a youthful Gert would play Pac-Man and Asteroids while he waited for a cheeseburger from Malcolm at Cub’s.  By the cinema where Shroom got carpal tunnel from the Wrangler Two-Seamer in the early 90s.  Past Table 9, formerly Planet Red, where Bayliner taught Country Square and Line Dancing before selling boats.  And finally, according to Gert’s watch map, we climbed over the Bojangles before crossing Hwy 58 again.

During the merkin portion of the Merkin(ish) Mile, Jang made sure to be right beside YHC to keep him accountable for the correct rep numbers matching the count given.  Tclaps Jang.  Hope I made you proud.

Recovering from the Merkin mile-ish we hustled to back of the park and the centerpiece of the park for

Thang II-All-terrain Dora

Here’s where it got sideways.  Partner A would AMRAP the prescribed exercise while Partner B ran a lap around the skate park.  The lap went down a rock road, up a sand dune, and then came back down the slipperiest concrete this side of goose turd.  Good times, Am I right?  The exercises were of course

100 Burpees

200 Merkins

300 Squats

Suitcase and Denver got confused and did 200 burpees and 100 merkins, ouch.  But like I’ve said many times…two things in life you will always pay for:  convenience and ignorance.  MyT says you will also always pay for Russian dancers, but who is he anyway?

Some observations were made during the Dora experience.  Once the sand got chewed up going up the hill, it got way more precarious.  Burpees suck.  The mumblechatter ceased until everyone was almost finished and we joined the six.  I chased Plunger every single lap and I never caught him.  Attaboy Plunger.  And lastly, burpees suck.

Denver provided a much needed 10 count, because it is OK to rest for a couple of seconds.  And then we were off towards the merry go round

Thang 3—Playground Games

All of the Partner As would put their hands on the merry go round and move in unison, without crossing their feet plank jack style, 5 laps around the merry go round.  Au Jus got dizzy and took off his pants.  Not weird at all.

The Partner Bs were all holding a high plank until the 5 laps were complete and then flap jack.

Lap two around the Merry Go Round, found the Partner As keeping their feet still and passing the merry go round around while in an urkin position.  Let it be known, the Partner Bs did NOT do it this way.

The others would do a 6 inch hold, or just lay on the ground while waiting.

Before heading to the Splash Pad for our last iteration, there was a basketball court and a basketball.  Our resident basketball State Champion was given a free throw to keep the Pax from doing 5 more burpees.  Needless to say with spent arms he missed and we did the burpees.  After Gert, the Nan’tan himself took a “shot.”  I’ve seen him shoot a gun and he is very good.  I’ve seen him shoot me the bird, also highly skilled.  A basketball?  Not so much.  But State’s a baseball school so I get it.  And with his “miss” we preformed 5 more burpees.

We moseyed a small pace to some two-man benches circumscribing the Splash Pad.  Each set of partners had a bench.  One partner would do dips and the other derkins in reps of 5, 10, and 15, switching after each set.  It is possible YHC fell on his neck during the last set of derkins.  This, however, is unsubstantiated.

Mary consisted of 20 reps of Penguin Crunches.

And Hard Stop.


YHC Q’s the Anchor Ball

Suitcase has the QAR

Pasqually has the Dread.  No shot he’s on time.

Patriots play at home on Tuesday night.

Reef didn’t fart sack

Prayer Concerns

Little John

Frosted Flake

MyT’s mother

YHC took the Pax out in the ball of man.  The moments of quiet this morning provided a din of His presence.  Birds, ocean, and breathing.

Thanks for coming out to play.

DB, out.



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